It’s difficult to explain the feeling of anxiety, but I’m going to try. I’m not a fan of things that I don’t understand and even less of a fan of things that I can’t explain. I’m also pretty sure I’m not the only one, so here’s to those who want to undertand.
You know that feeling you get when you reach for your phone in the zip pocket of your bag (because that’s where you keep it, that’s where you always put it) and it’s not there? Your stomach drops. You feel tense and agitated. Your mind starts racing through the last few hours of your life wondering what you could have done resulting in you putting your phone down somewhere that isn’t that zip pocket in your bag. It doesn’t matter if seconds later you find it hiding in the other zip pocket, in that second it was gone. You panicked.
Now, extend that feeling. For a few minutes. For a few hours. For an entire day.
That’s what anxiety feels like. Apart from the fact that some of the time, there is no reason. There is no misplaced phone. Just that gut wrenching feeling that something has gone (or is about to go) wrong.
The good news is, once you know it’s just anxiety, you can start to cut it off there. Yep, I feel anxious, I’m just going to have to ride it out. It’s not quite as easy as that, but I’m working on it. Hopefully one day it really can be that easy.
I know I’m writing a lot about anxiety and not very much about other things, it’s just that it’s such a big part of my life at the minute. I start back at work tomorrow – I’m looking forward to it. It’s a really big step towards getting things back to normal. Hopefully then I can write more about gin and food and all the other things that make life great.
Until next time,